Unfortunately, they’re in my bedroom. It’s the only room in the house with a window A/C unit, and even though the house is shaded well and insulated, a stretch of 90-degree weather can mess with my fermentation. So I’ve got 10 lbs. of sauerkraut daintily burping in a crock on the floor and two gallons of dill pickles and a half-gallon of fermenting hot peppers perfuming the air atop my cedar chest. All I need is a few urchins in rags and a line of laundry across the ceiling to complete the look.